Anniversaries of Tragedy of 9/11/01

Be it the loss of a job, a divorce, financial change, or the death of a loved one, life is a series of losses. Chronic illness and the adjustment to new life styles create stress and a loss of different proportions. People grieve the loss of a pet. In the last few years, communities, families, schools and our society has had to deal with school violence, that is taking lives.

As the author of Molly and Monet, a marriage and family therapist, and counseling psychologist, specializing in grief work, I would like to make a few current remarks about the violence in our schools. Many years’ back, I personally experienced working with troubled high school teens. In that experience, I helped stop a problem that would have turned into a major disaster.

Now more than ever, teens are being bullied at school, left alone because of the necessity of two parents working. In the recent events of the last few weeks, there have been major changes in the perpetrator life that were warning signals, such as major change in life style.

Now, more than ever, we must look at young people and listen to their problems. As parents and responsible adults, we must pay attention to resentfulness, revengeful behavior, anger, alienation and isolation. We must be watchful of children’s remarks regarding suicide, murder, and the urge to injure another. We must pay very strict attention to any change in behavior, and especially bullying. If we hear, see, or feel anything that doesn’t feel right, we must take responsibility and talk with the parents, schools, law enforcement, and engage these troubled children into conversation.

I personally feel that we need to constantly be aware of an "emotional temperature." We need to access our own children, and others. If there is strange behavior that is manifested, we need to think about acting and reporting to the proper people.

It takes parents, schools, love, and caring to raise and detect these problems. I feel strongly that schools should have well trained counselors, in marriage and family therapy or social work, or psychologists on the campus, to deal with troubled children, who may not be able to talk at home, or are having any of the above symptoms. Through a many pronged approach, of good parenting, talking, listening, and school involvement of professionals into these children’s lives, I think we can make a difference.

It is my opinion that we need anger management classes, groups for kids, to role-play what it feels like to be bullied. Our society has become violent on the roads with road rage, and violence in the home. We need to monitor our children’s television, computer, radio, and CD involvement, and place limits. Children will mirror what goes on in the family.

Diane R. Isaacs, PhD

CURRENT UPDATES:  November 27, 2001

It has been many weeks since that catastrophic event in our beloved America.  The events of September 11th, 2001 plus the airplane crash that followed later have been difficult for all the victims and their families.  It has also affected most Americans.  We do not feel the same safety net in our country.  Now it has happened on our soil. We are truly faced with evil and tragedy.  

To help any of us understand the psychological implications, we must understand that the activating effect of terrorism of any kind provokes fear, dread, and hopelessness in the population.  These behaviors and feelings resulting from these past tragic events can and have caused many of our nation to feel nervousness, avoidance of our daily activities, and despair, pessimism, mistrust, which can lead to claustrophobic behavior with how we deal with ourselves and families.

As I speak on the radio and appear on television throughout the country, I sense a low-grade depression, cynicism, and general feelings of wanting to withdraw.  

As an optimist, ultimately, good will come out of all of this.  We already see a united country.  People are re-engaging with their families, which helps people to feel more centered.  People are reacquainting themselves with a spiritual self. There is Patriotism that is alive and well across our country.

As I have tried to show in Molly and Monet, we as a nation must go through a grieving process.  We must cross from one side of the bridge to the other side where there is light.  It will take time and energy.  We can donate our time and energy to people, and do things within our families to be less susceptible to stress.

As the Author of Molly and Monet, which is a grief book, about surviving the loss of a loved one, I have been the victim of terrorism, as I watched my late husband gunned down and then the gunman come for me. My life too, changed forever, just as our lives have changed from the events of Sept.11th.  I know what these people and their families are thinking and feeling.  This is an unpleasant process for everyone, including the families who have sent their loved ones off to fight far away from home for Democracy.

The holidays are going to be difficult for the survivors of Sept 11th, 2001.  People all over the country are beginning to comprehend the enormity of what has happened as the result of TERRORISM on our soil.  The shock, numbness, are beginning to turn to anger, fear, resentment, and concern for our future as a civilization.  Psychologically, this has taken a toll, as I have spoken across the nation, and lectured.  People are having more difficulty coping, making decisions, and sleeping.  The visuals from television are in our heads, and are etched forever.  

Life will return to a normalcy.  It can never be the same, and so it will be a different kind of way of going about our lives. It will take time and adjustments.

We need to understand that time will make all of this better.  Part of this healing and grief process is to take back control over our own personal lives.  That is why I am currently writing a book, on that subject

I am in the middle of another book on Terrorism and Conflict - walking through the minefield....... 

As quoted from Newsweek's July 2nd cover, "What made Andrea Yates Snap"?

1. Why did she have any more children after she suffered her first bout of post partum depression? Once a woman has experienced postpartum episode with psychotic features, the risk of recurrence with each subsequent delivery is between 30% and 50%. Where were the OB Gyn and her doctors, and where was the psychiatrist? What on earth were Rusty and Andrea thinking about, compounding their plight?
2. Why wasn’t Andrea hospitalized for psychiatric evaluation and treatment?
3. Why is the press sticking a microphone in Rusty’s face right after he finds out what happens? Has anyone looked at the grief Rusty must feel, and the torture and guilt he must be feeling? He not only has lost his children, he has lost his wife. I professionally don't think he was in a capable state to say what he did. He was in SHOCK AND THE EARLY STAGE OF GRIEVING AND CONFUSION.
4. Andrea in my professional opinion is guilty of a terrible and horrific act of Infanticide, which has been a disturbing practice that dates back to ancient times. "When she did have her right mind," why did she want any more children? She knew she had psychotic thoughts and depression before.
5. Why didn’t the other family members and nuclear family and friends step in, as reports indicate she had not only been depressed before, but delusional and psychotic.
6. Doesn’t Rusty have some responsibility here, as well as doctors who knew her history, including suicidal behavior and attempts?

UPCOMING EVENTS:

Radio shows from Boston, Vermont, Cincinnati, Ohio, and various other radio broadcasts, and newsprint....as of 2004